Morning Yoga

I loved teaching yoga at 6 am this Monday morning.  The temperature was crisp, and I could feel fall creeping in to the air.  I've always loved mornings, but spending it with three other amazing women, chatting over coffee, and then leading them through a practice made for an extra special morning.   I am really excited about this class time and am hoping to add another soon.

Here's the poem I read to them in child's pose.

A Morning Offering

by John O'Donohue

I bless the night that nourished my heart
To set the ghosts of longing free
Into the flow and figure of dream
That went to harvest from the dark
Bread for the hunger no one sees.

All that is eternal in me
Welcome the wonder of this day,
The field of brightness it creates
Offering time for each thing
To arise and illuminate.

I place on the altar of dawn:
The quiet loyalty of breath,
The tent of thought where I shelter,
Wave of desire I am shore to
And all beauty drawn to the eye.

May my mind come alive today
To the invisible geography
That invites me to new frontiers,
To break the dead shell of yesterdays,
To risk being disturbed and changed.

May I have the courage today
To live the life that I would love,
To postpone my dream no longer
But do at last what I came here for
And waste my heart on fear no more.

We ended with Van Morrison's "Into the Mystic."  I love this song and the encouragement to "let your soul and spirit fly." 

The rest of my Monday will thank me for this morning. It was a glorious start to the week...the same week that ends with the glorious start of college football season!  Yay!

What a Day

Not every day is bliss.  Some days are just down right hard.  I try so hard to be optimistic, count my blessings, and find beauty in tough moments, but today was not one of those days.

I love Glennon Melton Doyle's article "Carpe Diem."  If you're a mom and don't have her book Carry on Warrior, get it, today.  In the article, the idea to seize the moment, enjoy every second, and be happy all the time makes her panicky and paranoid, especially while raising young kids.  After being stopped in Target by a little old lady, while her kids were going absolutely nuts, and being told that she should enjoy every single little moment, even this one, she wrote the article.  Of course, she's been accused of being negative and not grateful enough. Here's what she says,

"My point is this: I used to worry that not only was I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn't enjoying it enough.  Double failure.  I felt guilty because I wasn't in parenting ecstasy every hour of every day and I wasn't making the most of every moment like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing.  I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often.  But the fact remains that one day, I will be that nostalgic lady in the grocery store.  And here's what I hope to say to the younger mama gritting her teeth in line: "It's helluva hard, isn't it?  You're a good mom, I can tell.  And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner.  She's my favorite.  Carry on, warrior.  Six hours 'til bedtime.""

I will spare you every gory detail, but Wills has bronchitis and is pretty pitiful.  But worse than the actual virus, is the prednisone he has to take.  It is making him awful.  Does it do this to all men?  I've learned to steer clear of William and my dad if they are ever taking this steroid.  But now, my son?  It totally transformed my laid-back child into an angry, frustrated little boy and all he really wanted to do was cry and throw his toys.  I gave up disciplining him hours before bedtime, and just prayed for William to get home.

He wouldn't touch his dinner.

Unfortunately, William got stuck at work, so I made a simple veggie burger for dinner.  After being on the computer hosting parent conferences every half hour since 8 am, I wasn't in the mood for anything more.

Served with half of a whole wheat English muffin, tomato, avocado and sriracha.

When William finally walked in the door, I gave him a kiss, asked him how his day was, and promptly went up stairs, glass of wine and book in hand.  At this point, I wasn't going to be any fun to hang out with.  Sorry, honey.

Maybe Glennon's right, and we don't have to be excited every. single. moment.  Find the little moments, the snuggles on the couch, the apple and peanut butter we shared before nap time, the bear hugs and (snotty) Eskimo kisses that come all day long, and watching him concentrate and then get so proud when he thinks he stayed inside the lines while coloring. Seize those moments; then you can still call the day a success. 

And then say a little prayer of thanks that it's Friday, and we made it. 

"What I ate Wednesday"

Thanks for all of the amazing feedback around my last weekend of teacher training post.  It means a lot.  I purposely didn't mention my goals around this blog.  I'll keep that one a secret, for now. ;)

Early Wednesday morning, I dropped Wills off with my parents.  I had an 8 am meeting, a date with my yoga mat (that fell through due to the meeting running a little long), and then I taught a Power60 class at Dancing Dogs Yoga.  I packed a granola bar and a banana but ended up eating breakfast at my parents.  My mom made me an egg sandwich on an English muffin.  I didn't take a picture, but here's my breakfast from Tuesday, just to have something to share.

I rushed home from yoga for a parent conference and snacked on a banana, peanut butter, and shredded coconut.

Lunch was my typical spring mix salad with strawberries, smoked almonds, blue cheese, and Brianna's All Natural strawberry blush dressing.  I also enjoyed Pretzel Crisps with this new, amazing Edamame Hummus with roasted red pepper and sesame.  Try it!  The ingredients are simple and it's full of protein, fiber and healthy fat.

Since William travels so often these days, grilling is not much of an option.  I guess I could learn, but I have no desire.  I don't bake chicken very often, simply because we usually grill, but I tried something new tonight.

Seems to be a repeating theme here...:)

I marinaded boneless chicken breasts in Italian dressing, placed them on a baking sheet, topped with mushrooms, and blue cheese crumbles and baked them on 350 degrees for 45 minutes.  They were so flavorful and delicious.  I will definitely be making this again.  Sweet potato fries and sauteed zucchini paired perfectly with the chicken.

Happy Wednesday!  Half-way through the work week!  Yay!

What I learned in Yoga Teacher Training

I started to write this post last week, and then I had to stop.  Honestly, putting this experience into words is nearly impossible.  So I reflected a little more, took some time, and decided that it doesn't have to be perfect, it just has to be me.

When I started this journey I had no idea what to expect.  I've always had this idea around yoga and thought it would be something I would like, but I didn't know much about it.  Let me just say, I know a lot about it now - 34 pages of a written exam to be exact.  I know the 53 poses in a Baptiste yoga class.  I know some of the business aspects behind opening a studio and taking on clients.  I even know a little Sanskrit.

But, most of all, I know so much more about being a powerful woman.  And through that power and greatness, I can make others great.  That's what we do as yoga teachers - we help others see their greatness; we empower.

My "Shereadstruth" devotions this month are about fresh starts and how "He makes all things new." Rev. 21:5  I love how every time I step on my mat God reminds me that there's always a fresh start; a time for renewal - to walk away from the old and step into something new; a time to reconnect to who I am and who I want to be.  William comments all the time saying, "I thought you were just learning to teach an exercise class, yet you never talk about the exercise.  You talk about all this other stuff."  He's so right.  The other "stuff" is why I love yoga.  Yoga is a way of being inspired, and it's so much more than exercise!

Teacher training also taught me the JOY that comes in simplifying.  I tend to put meaning around everything!  Sometimes, it's better to just listen, be still, and relax with what is.  Not everything has to be complicated or followed with worry and anticipation.  I learned to shift my vision to simplicity and joy.  Let me tell you, it's so much easier and less exhausting to live this way.

In the past 8 months I was challenged to set BIG goals.  Shelley, one of the leaders of the training, is such a possibility junkie and says "if you are reaching every single goal you set, you aren't setting them high enough."  If your goals don't scare you, change them.  I have quite a few goals on my list - some scarier than others, so I'm putting a few out there.  I will write a novel, or better yet, I will finish the one I've started (barely).  Then, I will write another one.  I will grow a huge garden and feed my family from it.  I will do a handstand.  One day, I will lead a yoga teacher training.  The only thing standing between me and what I really want, is me.  What am I waiting for?

I became a part of an incredible community throughout this process.  The friends and relationships formed are inevitably some of the strongest I've ever had.  We shared, loved, cried, complained, laughed, and encouraged one another each and every time we were together.  I have to admit, I struggle with endings, and this one was no different.  I was overwhelmed with feelings of sadness, relief, and joy all at the same time.  In the end, I'm thankful I was sad - it means we made connections.  People live longer when they have community and make connections.  Teacher training taught me this.

After our 7 am exam on Sunday, we all celebrated with 10 am beers on the dock.

Later that afternoon, we had our graduation ceremony and celebration.

I've said it before, but for probably only the second time in my life, I dropped my fear and stepped into something bold and new...not because it made perfect sense, or was the right timing, but because this is the only life we get.  And it's happening, right now.

Lastly, teacher training taught me a different perspective on love.  Sometimes we love with expectations.  And although it's okay to have expectations of those around us, it's important and crucial to be supportive and open to their possibilities.  I don't want to have mediocre relationships; we were created to be in relationships - why not be in them powerfully?  It's important for me to hold space for people, to listen without always bringing in my point of view, and to let people be who they are and then decide to love them right there.  It all comes down to love; and in the end, that's all we really need.

I couldn't have done this without my family and our friends who played such a huge part in helping out with Wills while I was in Beaufort, studying for the test, and practice teaching at the studio.  Knowing he was taken care of and loved, made every weekend that much better.  I am also so thankful to Mark, Shelley, Dancing Dogs Yoga, Mind Body Yoga, and these 50 amazing yogi's that joined me on this journey.  Watch out world!  This is an inspired group of people.

Lastly, my husband...you encouraged me and gave me the space to chase my dream; thank you. Times a million.  

Procrastinating...

I'm procrastinating.  I don't want to click "Publish" just yet on my final yoga teacher training post.  For one, I want it to be perfect.  And two, I don't want it to be over.  I hate endings.

I keep reminding myself, "Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened."

But, I promise...it's coming soon.  Maybe tomorrow.

For now, can I distract you with this?  I know it's still the middle of summer, but the mornings have been chilly and Fall is near.  I can feel it.

I LOVE the changing seasons.  I feel like I've written so much about it.  For some reason, the crisp air, pumpkin making it's way into everything I cook, cheering for the Dawgs, cute scarves, and dinners on the patio, inspire me in a way nothing else does.  

To me Fall is romance, cozy fires, and red wine.  What's not to love?

Wills Makes Pesto

Our basil was the only herb that survived the frequent travel, hot weather, and caterpillars that destroyed the dill and cilantro.

My first attempt at toasting pine nuts for fresh pesto was a huge fail.

Someone was not happy about this. That makes two of us.

I added more pine nuts to the grocery list and distracted Wills with strawberries.

Before our second attempt, Wills and I picked more basil together.  Plus, my sweet friend, Julia, graciously gave us some off of her plant.  Hers looked much better than ours, so I was glad to have it to add to the mix.

We LOVE the smell of fresh basil.

I set the timer, and the second pine nut attempt was a success.

We gathered our ingredients.

And added them to the food processor. (These measurements are approximates...2 cups of fresh basil, 1/3 cup of olive oil, 1/4 cup of pine nuts and 1/4 cup fresh shaved Parmesan, Himilayan sea salt to taste)

And then I remembered we forgot garlic.  I will be putting this back into the food processor later today and adding 2 cloves of garlic.  Oops.  It still tasted delicious.  But, by tonight, it will be perfect.

Thanks, Wills!  Mommy loves cooking with you!

Creating Something New

The only good thing about getting to the end of the Sunbutter jar is...

Overnight Oats!

This sunflower seed butter is my new favorite.  Seriously, the taste is amazing - nutty and sweet and so different from peanut or almond butter.  There was about a Tablespoon of Sunbutter left in the bottom and sides of the jar, so I added a cup of Greek yogurt, 1/3 cup of raw oats, and 1/3 cup of almond milk.  I stirred it together and put it in the fridge overnight.

This morning I added strawberries and shredded coconut.

Along with savoring every bite of this, I also savored the fact that today is something new for me; it's a little surreal.  All of my teacher friends are greeting their smiling, nervous students today, and although I do miss a few small parts, I am beyond excited for this new opportunity to stay home with my boys, teach high school English online and power yoga at Dancing Dogs, blog more, have time to cook, grocery shop and try new recipes, stay up later with my husband because I don't have to be at work at 6:30 am, and say yes to traveling because now I can work from wherever.  This was a huge risk and leap of faith for me.  It was safe to stay where I was, with job security, great benefits, and just the simple knowledge of what to expect.  But what kind of growth comes with staying, just to stay?  I was scared - still am.  I have no idea what I am doing with this new position, but I am learning.  And I'm proud of myself.  For stepping outside of my comfort zone, beyond what may be the most practical decision, beyond what is comfortable, and choosing to CREATE the life that I want and that's best for my family.  Sometimes we have to give something up to create something new.  I dropped my fear, and stepped into something bold and unknown; and I'm excited!